Growing in Love, Faith, and Hope.

Growing up in a Christian family, i was born in faith. I knew how to Love God, to hope for the better, and to place all of my life in the word of our Lord. Like every human being, i grew up. I learned how to pray, how to talk to God , and eventually, how to preach the word to others. I’ve preached about our faithful Savior to most of my friends, and when i saw a glimpse of hope, i would help them to be Christians. I wanted every human being out there; every person; every mother,daughter,father,son,uncle,etc. to feel the Love, and encouragement,i had received all of my life from Christ. I wanted everyone to share the happiness of having our burdens uplifted, and placed in the palm of His hands. I gradually learned to concentrate on helping one person at a time. Keep in mind, i was merely a 7th, 8th, and high school grader. Time passed on ,and my faith in God grew, to the point where i felt his presence. I felt his arms around me, but most importantly , i felt his breath of hope for my future. I even remember riding in the car, looking up at the sky, and feeling an incredible burst of Love within my heart; a couple of times i would say that i Loved God so much, that my heart would explode from the overwhelming happiness. Then, about seven months ago, upon returning from a trip, i started to lose faith. i went into severe depression, and i wanted nothing but to curl up in my mom’s arms, and sleep life away. The depression was a gut punch, considering, i had no reason to feel that particular way. Nothing in my life was going wrong. Why did a sudden emergence of depression, and utter doubt, sink to the sole of my helpless stomach? every day for 3 months, i would try my hardest to talk to my Light. I would look up, and say, God…where are you? I would cry my self to sleep, and ask God to reveal himself to me in a dream, or real life, to increase my faith. After all, i was his faithful follower for oh-so-many years. Days would pass by in a blur. The one hope, the one fraction of optimism i had deep within my weary heart, had decided to disintegrate. During these hard times, i had been preaching to my best friend who was struggling from poorly preached Christianity, and depression. I thought I was truly going to change her, to uplift her faith, and help her place her life into God’s powerful hands. I would help her disect Bible verse so she would understand them, teach her how to pray, teach her how to have hope, and Love. Her faith was growing, mine was being pulled under a sheet of overbearing doubt. I became more and more frustrated with God; i asked my self, ” why would he do this to me? his ever so faithful child, who has done nothing but preach his undying love?” Months passed, and i decided to work on my faith; i read books, Googled ( i know, haha), read the Bible, and spend hours talking to my family, and my Christian friend. Then, i came upon this website. These Testimonies, began to uplift my faith. If God works with people, then he must be working with me, but because of my doubt, i cannot see it in my plain dreary eyes. A familiar voice appeared in my heart, and spoke to me. He hugged me. I felt complete again. My months of being pulled under a sea of endless doubt, slowly became the water that flourished my glistening flower of faith. I realized after many months of my praying, reading The Bible, and reading Testimonies, that God has been there all along. My faith was always a child’s mustered seed, God wanted my faith to turn into an adults garden of life. He wanted me to experiences what people who have doubts, troubles, and weariness feel, when they loose everything they have ever loved, in order for me to preach to them, in a way to relate. I realized that in order to grow, one must test their wings, and take a step away from the nest. Finally, i realized that God, wanted to see if my faith was built on a rock, or a crumbling tower of sand, that comes crashing at the slightest bit of wind. I became alive, i preach now in a way where i relate to the people who went through these experiences; i built my faith on a solid foundation. I grew, i soared with my developed wings, and trust my life in Christ. I am now continuously growing in faith, hope, and Love (Lord willing), and i know by taking my Saviors hand, my foot prints in the sand, will leave a mark, for other followers to step into.

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